
WWE
Happy Austin 3:16 Day, or as non-wrestling fans know it, “Is it still okay to eat that leftover pie you forgot to put in the fridge” Day. By now, Austin 3:16 is timeless; it was the birth of a whole new era, and an important cog in the gears of the Monday Night Wars. Stone Cold Steve Austin cut the following promo on Jake The Snake Roberts after winning the King of the Ring tournament in 1996:
The first thing I want to be done is to get that piece of crap out of my ring. Don’t just get him out of the ring—get him out of the WWF. Because I proved, son, without a shadow of a doubt, you ain’t got what it takes any more. You sit there and you thump your Bible and you say your prayers and it didn’t get you anywhere. Talk about your Psalms, talk about John 3:16 — Austin 3:16 says I just whipped your ass. All he’s gotta do is go buy him a cheap bottle of Thunderbird and try to get back some of that courage he had in his prime.
As the King of the Ring, I’m serving notice to every one of the WWF Superstars—I don’t give a damn what they are—they’re all on the list and that’s Stone Cold’s list and I’m fixin’ to start running through all of ‘em. Piss off. As far as this championship match is considered, son, I don’t give a damn if it’s Davey Boy Smith or Shawn Michael- — Steve Austin’s time has come. And when I get the shot, you’re looking at the next WWF Champion, and that’s the bottom line ‘cause Stone Cold said so.
For the tl;dr crowd (or “too long; didn’t memorize”), you can also watch the entire thing on the WWE Network, or, should you feel more inclined, this reversed YouTube version that seems to be the most accessible:
To celebrate, let’s take a look back at the origins and aftermath of one of the most iconic phrases in pro wrestling history.
1. No Michael P.S. Hayes, No Austin 3:16
Now, this falls squarely in the wheelhouse of people who will inevitably respond with “what the heck, of course we know that. Earlier today I saw someone say they didn’t remember King of the Ring 1996 because it happened before they were born. After taking a personal moment to remember that I’m nine days away from turning 30 and then taking some deep breaths into a paper bag, I figured the actual origins would be a good place to start.
Initially, Steve Austin was never supposed to compete in King of the Ring. In what’s described as some “disciplinary measures,” Austin was put into the tournament as a last-minute decision. It’s said that Austin’s push was supposedly meant for Triple H, which is a real shame. That guy can never catch a break, huh. Any cursory knowledge of Austin’s career will tell you that he was the best at taking the meager opportunities handed to him and spinning them into some of the most memorable and beloved character work of his career. This was no exception.
During his first match of the night, Austin got kicked in the mouth by Marc Mero so hard he had to be taken to the hospital. 14 stitches later, Austin arrived back at the show after Jake the Snake Roberts had already cut his promo for their match set for later in the evening. Michael P.S. Hayes – former Freebird, Badstreet occupant, and then ring announcer under the name Dok Hendrix – told Austin about the promo, letting him know that he was to wrestle Roberts for the title of King of the Ring, and that he had cut a religious-based promo on Austin. Now, this timeline does gets a little squicky: in Austin’s book, it’s intimated that he found out before going to the hospital, but in later interviews and retrospectives it’s said that he found out he was going to go over in the final after coming back. Either way, without that conversation with Hayes, the idea to respond in kind would have never been born.
2. To Take It Even Further – No Rainbow Man, No Austin 3:16
Again, speaking to those of A Certain Age, it wasn’t uncommon to see JOHN 3:16 signs in the crowds at sporting events, or really anyplace someone could possibly be noticed holding up a sign. The pervasive Biblical passage is described as God’s word in a nutshell: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” You can find that inscribed on the bottom of retail chain Forever 21’s bags, or printed on the underside of In-N-Out Burger cups. It’s a way to advertise faith-based beliefs without being overly proactive and in-your-face.
From the late Seventies to the early Nineties, a man named Rollen Stewart would attend various sporting events, donning a multi-coloured clown wig and brandishing a JOHN 3:16 sign. For three years he was simply The Rainbow Man, but after the 1980 Super Bowl he was inspired by a televangelist to become a Born Again Christian, and integrate the bible passage into his “act.” From then on he would put himself in view behind home plate at MLB games, between goal posts at NFL games, even going so far as holding a sign up behind Jack Nicklaus at the Masters. One man’s crazy is another’s pop-culture phenomenon, and the trend of holding up the signs extended far beyond the lone act of a guy who loved Jesus and clown wigs.
Steve Austin said that it was the first thing that came into his mind, given that he had often seen signs of the scripture held up at football games. Were it not for Rollen Stewart and his effect on sports culture, Steve Austin may not have had the effect on pro wrestling that he did.
That said, it’s important to note that Stewart is currently serving three life terms in California for locking himself in a Los Angeles hotel during an eight-hour standoff with police/SWAT, holding a maid hostage, and threatening to shoot down airplanes as they took off and landed at nearby LAX. So, y’know…maybe think twice about trying to become the next Brock Lesnar Guy.